By Kim Arlington
A SEVEN-year-old girl caught in the middle of her parents' acrimonious relationship breakdown has had to assume ''an almost adult, if not parental role herself'' to try to ease the conflict between them.
The observation was made by a federal magistrate, Leanne Turner, who said the estranged couple ''have conducted themselves appallingly in their dealings with each other since separation, often failing to take steps to shield the children from exposure to their immature behaviour''.
The pair's eldest daughter told a family consultant her parents ''should just talk to each other and be nice to each other''. ''If I had a magic box,'' she said, ''I'd do anger tricks for them.''
The girl and her younger sister were born to a same-sex couple who separated in 2009. Her birth mother sought sole parental responsibility for the children. Her sister's birth mother wanted equal shared care.
The girl wanted time split equally between her mothers. She said: ''I don't want them to get meaner to each other - they fight about how many days they have with us,'' but Ms Turner found it would not be in the children's best interests.
She noted that the women often provoked each other in front of their children and used the girls to convey information.
A family consultant reported to the Federal Magistrates Court that the girls were struggling to cope. Not only was the conflict stressful for the children, the mothers seemed ''emotionally exhausted by their acrimonious relationship''.
''But amazingly, and despite their totally dysfunctional relationship post separation, [the consultant] states that the children are an absolute delight and that is to the credit of both parties,'' Ms Turner said.
Each of the women obviously loved and cherished the girls, she said, and took their role as a mother very seriously, while the children were attached to both mothers and loved them equally.
Ms Turner ordered that the children live with the elder girl's birth mother and spend regular time with their other mother and the women had to stop bickering and exposing their children to conflict.